Back in San Diego, I had grown accustomed to being blinded by a woman pushing her shopping cart in the supermarket, her bling-bling engagement ring stunning me with its brilliance and beauty. Here, and throughout my travels in this region, I have yet to come across such an encounter. I am constantly scanning the female hands around me in search of diamonds, and if I am lucky enough to find one, it's most likely attached to an American hand.I've spoken to several Swiss and German women, and they tell me it's just not very common to receive a diamond engagement ring. If they do receive one, it's rarely ever worn after the wedding, unlike many American women who often wear the engagement ring and wedding band together as a set. Instead, you'll find lots of simple yellow or white gold wedding bands gracing these European ring fingers. I fit right in.
You see, Isaiah and I never got engaged. Yep, we skipped that part. We decided to get married, and two weeks later we made it happen. Today, we wear matching white gold bands. Mine is small and dainty and makes me smile each time I look down at it, though I never imagined that my ring finger would be diamond-less. Truth be told, before I met Isaiah (long, long before I met him), you could have overheard me telling my mom, "I won't accept a marriage proposal with anything less than a 2-carat diamond." Gasp! Needless to say, I have come a long way. (My goodness -- who was that girl?)
That's not to say I don't want a nice piece of finger bling someday, and luckily Isaiah still wants to buy me one. (I am indeed my father's daughter. Dear old Dad wears this gold nugget of a ring encrusted with diamonds, one of which is a 2-carat. Yeah, don't ask.) The thing is, I don't want Isaiah to feel obligated to buy me a diamond, or diamonds, because it's what society and tradition (and perhaps a little marketing) dictate a man must do for his bride. In fact, I don't really want what's traditionally considered a diamond engagement ring. After all, we are way past being engaged. So, if Isaiah decides he wants to spoil me with a really fabulous ring just because, then I have some ideas in mind.
Most importantly, the idea is to think outside of the engagement ring box. I especially like antique rings sprinkled with diamonds, or antique-looking rings. After some inspiration from this Blog Goggles post, I am also very open to rings featuring other gemstones.
This one is my very favorite.
Wedding photograph by Michael Pattanachinda
You're right... nobody even noticed my engagement ring here. I have an American style engagement-wedding set because it seemed like a shame to wear my diamond for 10 months and then put it away and only have a wedding ring a la Swiss style, so we had the set custom-made here, and I love it. Appropriate for marrying an American, I suppose. :)
ReplyDeleteI fit right in too, because my antique diamond engagement ring didn't work with a traditional wedding band, so I've actually got the band on my right hand, European style.
ReplyDeleteI have the set - the diamond and the wedding band - and I get asked about it all the time because it is so foreign to everyone here and because they expect it on the other hand - I think the right hand here is the wedding ring hand, right?
ReplyDeleteI think they like the idea - what girl doesn't love some diamonds?! - but it is definitely not the norm...
I actually don't wear diamonds so I had my husband design an art deco inspired engagement ring with my favorite stones-ruby, amythest and saphire set in white gold. It doesn't look at all like an engagement ring and my band simply surrounds the ring so people never realize that it's a wedding band set. Always thought the diamond ring thing was silly..
ReplyDeleteRomy - perfectly appropriate :) And had we not skipped being engaged, I am sure I too would have the all-American wedding set. Maybe it's better that I don't since I'd probably look down at it every 5 seconds - I just love how diamonds sparkle!! (I agree - pity to wear the diamond just for the duration of the engagement when diamonds go with everything!)
ReplyDeleteChantal - is it the right hand? I've seen both, I think. Maybe I should pay better attention. At least you are covered with one on each hand...
Jessica - the Swiss must think American girls are so spoiled!
Fly Girl - did you click on the link I attached to the word "marketing" in my post? I was disappointed to read that the tradition/popularity of diamond engagement rings actually stems from a marketing strategy, though somehow it doesn't make me like the sparkle of diamonds any less. Plus the blog I link to mentions blood diamonds and that is just terrifying. I'd love to own diamonds one day, but how can I be sure they are blood-free?
Anyway, YOUR ring sounds amazing. Art deco style - LOVE it, plus sapphire - my favorite gemstone, even over diamonds. WOW!
American styles rings are the most beautiful as compare to German and French I also like the American rings too much.
ReplyDeleteYour blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!
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